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May 27, 2017 - Brandon Marx

Top 25 Midwest – 2017

Every day, week, month and year, after every cash game, weekly, satellite, mid-major and World Series of Beer Pong there is some sort of discussion(argument) going on in multiple locations across the country about who the Best in the World is. So we at Pongstars.net have decided to create our own ranking systems with our own criteria. These rankings will consists of the Top 25 Players of each respective region so that the recognition of stellar talent and high level of play is properly rewarded. The criteria used was very simple and will be shared but the value of each will not. Criteria is as follows: Satellites, Current Year Finishes, Last Year Finishes, Partners(Who/Amount), Overall resume, and 1 v 1. We also take into account anyone who supplies us with a list of their own within their region. That being said, take a look at your current MIDWEST TOP 25 PLAYERS!!!

1. Ross Hampton
”Calling Ron Hampton to table 3…….Last call for Ron Hampton to table 3!” If any of you get that reference, then you’ve been around long enough to know that Ross wasn’t always Ross as far back as WS VI, so much so that they kept getting his and Ron Hamilton’s names mixed up. Since that year, Ross has not been very forgiving to anyone who laughed at his expense that night by winning everything a player could possibly win. We aren’t going to list each one because we have 24 other guys to get to and there’s already a page dedicated to such stats. We’ll just mention he’s won the two largest tournaments bpong has ever held along with four $10k events and two WSOBP Singles titles. With a resume like that Ross could not only find himself atop the Midwest, but the greatest of all-time list as well. Needless to say, no one is disappointed that he’s going to be missing this year’s WSOBP due to having his wedding so close to the event. Congrats Ross, we know you have a lot going on and there’s probably no time available for beer pong so we better not catch you resting your feet on any tables! smile

2. Scott Frew
Once known only for his skills producing the best write ups, rankings and prediction lists that anyone and especially this website could’ve ever asked for, he’s most certainly come along way over the years after reengineering his shot once, twice or ten times but he has seemed to found the one that works. However, regardless of skill it’s very rare to see a player with a relatively scarce resume – 2nd place EvW at WS10 – place so high on a regional list. The dominance that the aforementioned Ross has displayed has made it very hard for others to get that big win nod within this region. But ask around, not only is he one of the most genuinely nice pieces of shit that we have the privilege of knowing but he’s also more than a crowd favorite for #2 in the Midwest.

3. Donnie Jones
The Gray Mamba slides in at our #3 spot and much like Frew, combining the smoothness of his shot and the consistency with which it finds the bottom of the cup, it’s shocking that his resume is empty when it comes to big tournament victories. However, in his first trip to the WS last summer he was able to take 7th place with partner Eric Lewis as well as take down the annual Blondies shit show prior to the bpong festivities beginning. Very few players have the cult following that Donnie does despite his minuscule accomplishments, which is evident in his high rankings and constant fellatio whenever the elite are being talked about. Regardless of the jokes that his resume is the extent of a cover letter, we fully expect him to get over that hump rather soon and maybe even next Sunday. By the way, hey Nick Trupiano be sure to wipe your chin after reading this, you probably spilled a little.

4. Johnny Fourdyce
Call me maybe? An instant classic within our beloved community, so much so it once stopped a brawl that included 300 drunk Neanderthals dead in their tracks. You can often find our #4, Fourdyce, utilizing that song as reference among his Midwest brethren when discussing potential partner situations, one of many inside jokes among them. Johnny is another player who’s been so close to the mountain top of victory but just fell short. He had a 3rd place finish at his very first $10k which was located in Illinois and ran by Drunkenbear. Unfortunately that’s about all he has to show for that one as word is he’s till owed that 3rd place money all these years later. He’s also got a pair of 2nd place finishes in a $5k(STL) and a $10k(San Diego) both where he had the tall task of playing Ross for the title. That obviously didn’t work out too well for him but he continues to battle one even after numerous surgeries that have sidelined him competitively over the years. It’s been awhile since he’s seen the limelight and one can only assume he’s starving for that opportunity to once again fight to claim First Place.

5. Brent Saale
Constantly living in the shadow of someone else can’t be easy for anyone but we see it every sport there is. It’s part of what makes us the competitors we are because it forces us to make a choice. Be content or get better! Unfortunately for Brent, there’s no exception here having grown up as a player through the STL market to witness everything Ross has done. But at the same time, those ass kickings are what has made him the player he is to be able to obtain such a spot on a Top 25 list. The guy is nothing short of a monster on the table but he seems to be at his best while not paired up with one of the best of all time, for example, when he took down the single’s title at WS X two years ago. Granted, he did win the most recent Battle at the Beach in Virginia with Ross, but even that win comes with what some feel should be accompanied by an asterisk after the “Tablegate” shenanigans were revealed. Making an Alpha like Brent change his game to simply one of a supporting role, is much easier said than done so this coming series should be very interesting as he’s playing with a fellow WS Singles Champ, Brad “Moose” Mosdell. If we had to guess and we most certainly will next week, we look for Brent to improve on the disappointing WS XI finish and prove that he not only belongs on this list but every list.

6. Brandon Juracek
This time last year it was Brandon, or as the owner of “Linda’s Party Store” in Crump refers to him, Homeless, who was the trending topic in Michigan. He had won about 300 satellites, finished 3rd at the East Coast Championships and was undoubtedly the king of Bay City Lanes. What changed? Have his skills diminished? Has the weekly competition improved? Are Donnie’s “George Clooney” looks too intimidating or were those disgusting mud socks he called shoes finally weighing him down? Whatever the reason may be it seems as if the world has slightly fallen out of love with this Homeless fella. We can only hope his recent play has lit a fire under his ass and for him to bring it next weekend. We just hope he doesn’t forget his sleeping bag this time around, the streets of Las Vegas are no joke!

7. Ryan Catalano
Ryan Catalano of two years ago was literally the biggest waste of height in the game next to Michael Williams of Seattle, WA. All it took was a minor shot change and a hefty dose of Adderall and BAM….Michigan just starts breeding studs and the type of players that can go toe-to-toe with the likes of Sven in the BOMW singles finals. We just hope that he’s more interested in playing beer pong this year and not so much worrying about trolling one of the favorites with a not so clever team name. Fortunately for him, he’s not only upgraded that team name and adderall strength/dosage, he’s also got himself a pretty good partner who happens to be one spot ahead of him on this list!

8. Eric Lewis
The Lanky Lefty Eric Lewis has always been a good shot, but good god what the hell is up with his pre shot routine? We’re sorry, we can’t help but talk about a shot that’s eventually going to force some rule changes in order to further the growth of our sport! Ok, you’re right, let’s get back to his resume! Overall he’s pretty consistent and has amassed a few quality wins like when he won……..or when he took down that infamous……..SHIT! Like most of the Midwest beer pong scene, we know they’ve won stuff we just can’t remember…..right?

9. Michael Kloiber
Remember the Titans? Remember that carefree blonde who tossed a football with endless grace? Well other than the hair and the name, our #9 player has absolutely nothing else in common and we’re pretty sure the hair is fake, fyi. The man everyone calls sunshine because they genuinely have no clue that his real name is Michael is one of the most fun loving players in the community. It all started some years ago when he and longtime friend/partner Nathan Spears were attending a John Mayer concert in Atlantic City. They just happened to stumble upon an advertisement for the World Pong Tour 9ft beer pong tournament that weekend and entered. Having never played competitively in that manner, they managed to sneak their way into the top 10, ironically by defeating NY native Goliath and his partner who happens to own Pongstars.net. Since then he’s competed in numerous WS, ECBPCs, WCCs, and SCs over the years. He has yet to take home that 1st place prize but always finds himself in contention. Could this be the year for him? Only time will tell!

10. Keith Yackley
Keith Yackley… the guy who yells uncontrollably at the opponent that’s about to the shoot the simple ten rack, wears headphones while playing like only a nerd would and has a flawless head of hair no matter the time of day. Yup that pretty much sums up Mr. Yackley. Despite being the unofficial all time leader in finals trolling, he has somehow been voted by his peers to be placed in the #10 spot. In all seriousness he’s got one accomplishment that only some of the best in the world can say they’ve done and that’s make the final table of East vs West to kick off the World Series of Beer Pong. Easily one of the most brutal events of the year, Keith was not only able to clear a path to that final table by screaming obscenities in the worst of ways at the top of his lungs, but he also hit the cups needed for fellow top 10 partner, Scott Frew. As much as we don’t enjoy the antics of such a player from an organizers view, we as players can’t wait for the next stream of nonsense Keith decides to YACK!

11. Brendan Dyelle
12. Tyler Spencer
13.Kyle Eller
14. Shane Crawford
15. Brian Tomko
16. Nick Trupiano
17. Joe Moler
18. Todd Felder
19. Nick Harness
20. Travis Terrell
21. Jon Marczak
22. Anthony Mazurek
23. Faxon Townsend
24. Josh Hendo
25. Doug Mazurek

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